There is no well-defined line between the ending of Phase 1 and the beginning of Phase 2. The second phase in our lives begins when we decide it needs to begin. Hopefully we have prepared the way in Phase 1.
Phase 2 could be characterized as a “discovery” time in our lives and can be the most exciting time in your life as it gives you the most opportunities to explore your options. And by doing that, you get to discover more things about yourself that you may not have spent much time thinking about. For some people this can be scary, for others tremendously liberating.
Think about where you fall along that scale, and where you want to be.
Let’s be clear on what we’re talking about here: Meaning, purpose, and fulfillment are not the same things.
Meaning is attached to the feelings we get when we believe our actions make a positive difference in the lives of others.
Purpose is an answer to the questions “Why are we here, and what are we supposed to do?”
If you find this question to be too philosophical, ask yourself what your passion has been in your life, and see if that helps you define the idea of “purpose”. Or, ask yourself why you get out of bed every day. Or what makes you unique, and whether you want to make the best of those qualities and talents.
Living your life with purpose requires that you embrace two seemingly contradictory thoughts: that it is necessary to live a happy and fullfilled life, and that the world will still be fine when you are gone.
Fulfillment is a feeling of happiness and satisfaction; it’s also the completion of something such as the fulfillment of a promise.
Here are the challenges that typically get in our way:
Thinking that all the things you did and achieved in phase 1 are going to last forever. They don’t. This is a tough realization to get your mind around.
Losing sight of meaning and purpose as we age and deal with less energy than we once had. There is well-documented medical evidence that having a sense of purpose yields physical benefits.
Forgetting the passion we once had for meaningful aspects of our lives and finding ways to keep it alive.
Failing to reassess goals we had when we were younger, and failing to create new ones appropriate to our current ages and abilities.
Falling into routines of doing the same unfulfilling activities day after day, every day.
Failing to let go of “expectations”. It’s too easy to talk ourselves out of trying new things because of harboring negative expectations.
Forgetting that there are likely a number of things in our lives for which we should feel a sense of gratitude.
Here are some possibilities for involvement:
Volunteer work. The US ranked #1 in citing “Service and civic engagement” in what makes life meaningful.
Relationships with family and friends. There are usually opportunities for improvement here.
Home improvement. I’ve always been a bit envious of people with the skills to fix almost anything.
Exercise and sports. The medical evidence for improving physical health is convincing.
Anything creative: hobbies, art, music, gardening.
Education and learning. Including travel.
Church. Remember that the US mentioned religion more frequently than any of the other 16 countries in the Pew study as being an important factor in their lives.
Advocacy. Accompany a friend to a medical appointment to help ask the right questions and take notes.
And when you need a little enouragement:
Check out For Inspiration, an ongoing list of people who have mastered this phase and the next phase in their lives.
If you have the opportunity, find inspirational people to hang around with – people who are making a real difference in their later years.